The Friday Dispatch: January 31, 2025
Happy Groundhog Day Eve Eve!
Hello, happy Friday, happy belated birthday to my dad, happy day before the day before Groundhog Day! Earlier this week, I called my dad from an airport and sang him Happy Birthday. After I hung up, a random guy sitting in the seat across from me said “Good job singing happy birthday!” which was very validating.
In case you were curious: I got him1 a Willie Nelson Chia Pet. Ostensibly, you are meant to grow chia seeds on Willie Nelson’s head. But…since it’s Willie Nelson…that kind of feels…wrong? Eh. Your mileage may vary! Happy birthday, Daddy, here is a photo of us petting a tiger (!!!) to celebrate:
So, as I mentioned, I was at the airport earlier this week. I was flying back from Ohio, because I had a work trip. Longtime readers, you may recall that I battle a fear of flying! I’ve written about it before. A number of different things have helped me cope with this, including talking to pilots/flight attendants, investigative documentaries about crashes, flight simulators, and keeping up with flight radar.
On Wednesday evening, the pilots said our plane was delayed due to high winds in New York City, and also mentioned that we would likely need to circle the airport a few times before we were able to land, since there were other flights which were waiting there long before we were. So, I connected to my free in-flight wifi (thanks, T-Mobile). I figured that, if there was a delay, I could see how long it was expected to last, maybe get some intel on how other flights navigated the wind, etc.
Do you see where this is going?
FlightRadar24 wouldn’t load on such a tenuous connection, which I sort of expected. Luckily, there’s a dedicated subreddit where other FlightRadar24 users post updates, questions, and any abnormalities2 they might see on the app. I logged on. I sorted by “most recent.” And the most recent post, from 3 minutes earlier, was simply titled “Possible crash.” It was, of course, the collision between American Airlines flight 5342 and a military helicopter. The plane, a regional jet, was a CRJ700. I learned about it, minutes after it happened, while sitting on a CRJ900. At the time, I had no idea whether the crash was a collision, or related to those high-winds that our pilots had been avoiding, or, as I hoped then, a flight radar newbie erroneously reporting a loss in signal.
There was only one post about the crash on the subreddit. I clicked on it. I waited for the airplane wifi to load. No comments. I waited a few minutes. I checked the r/aviation subreddit. Nothing. So I went back to the FlightRadar24 subreddit. Scrolled to the post about the suspected crash. Two comments! I clicked on the post to see what the comments were. And that is when the wifi stopped working.
We had a turbulent landing. I’m grateful we landed—I am immensely grateful we landed—but, woof, those 20 minutes of circling LaGuardia, dipping a little, coming back up, and rattling in the wind were deeply, deeply unpleasant. My palms sweated so much that I felt it trickle down my wrists!!! But we made it. I don’t know that this experience, and the devastating accident in DC on Wednesday, necessarily changed my view of flying. Since I started working to combat that particular phobia, I’ve become familiar enough with aviation to know just how rare a tragedy like this is.
I do have a new rule for myself: NO looking at flight radar while ON the plane. Actually, two new rules. No more reading horror on planes! For most of the flight, I was absorbed in The Troop, a gross scary horror book. I had been in the library queue forever, then I accidentally hit “deliver again in 180 days” on Libby when my turn came up, and then my friends Martin and Grace loaned their copy to me.
So! Maybe if I wasn’t reading about “A horror that spreads faster than fear, and a harrowing struggle for survival with no escape from the elements,” I wouldn’t have been so freaked out to begin with. From now on, I will only make myself scared while also earthbound. Learn from my mistakes.
If You Want to Read Something Way Less Scary
An incredible mashup debuted on Substack this week. My workshop-friend-turned-regular-friend
has a new short story, available exclusively on , the newsletter of my OTHER very talented writer friend ! It’s called Neverland, New Mexico, and you can read it for free. If you need a free sample of the free sample, here’s my personal favorite line:Better yet are the signs, good omens—an orange peel withered on the sidewalk when she’s only just dreamed of eating clementines with her mother; her brothers’ names written in the corner of a library book; the fairylike tinkle of a wind chime on a walk around town—each a small sliver of starlight, a humble invitation to begin again.
Another Opportunity to Donate!
Hi! Last week, I shared a GoFundMe for Cindy Pacholke, who still needs help if you’re able to give. In addition, another family from my hometown is looking for financial support right now—and they’re less than $400 away from their goal!
I grew up with Sophia, who is currently running her household as her husband recovers from brain surgery and her 3-year-old son recovers from heart surgery. Sophia is also due with a baby in the next few weeks, so while she’s been putting everything she can into taking care of her husband and two sons, she’s going to need all the help she can get. You can donate here. Thank you for donating or sharing.
WIDNBTW
What did I buy this week? Well, a cab ride to the airport at 4:28 am on Tuesday morning. And a latte that came with a complimentary croissant skewer. And some of those hanger-extenders that let you stack even MORE clothes on them. And a potato the size of my head, full of cheese dip and sour cream and chopped peppers.
But you don’t care about all that! Here’s what I did NOT buy this week:
A wallet which looks like a Cosmic Brownie, which my friend Martin owns. When I looked up the wallet online, I discovered three things. One: It comes with a CHAIN. Two: It comes from Unjust Jewelry, a shop where my brother has bought some cool earrings. And three: I am nuts about this rainbow road ring.
Speaking of Martin, his sick and twisted Instagram algorithm is also the reason I learned about—but did not buy—the Scrub Daddy x Cif cream cleaner collab. If you want to learn more, watch this ad, but be warned! It is porn.
I didn’t buy my own coffee most of the week because Jen and Tori wouldn’t let me <3
Aldi’s chocolate wine
The “speed loafer” from HOKA, which are awesome, and which my friend Emily rightfully said I should buy Myles for our wedding. Interestingly, Today In Tabs called them “creepy”! And also, when will there be SPEED OXFORDS?
A mystery box from Tuesday Bassen, even though I might luck out and get the socks that just say “WOMEN’S SPORTS.”
An Omnilux red light face mask. I am considering it, but not for $400+. eBay here I come
Tiny Teletubby figurines from Five Below. Why are they yassified?
This absolutely adorable SPRINKLE DONUT HEADBAND from Claire’s (I regret not buying this one)!
Ed Hardy nail polish
Tickets to skaterobics at Xanadu, though I AM going to go on some weekend in the near future! If you are interested! And want to come too!
A dime saver that looks like a little kitty
And with that, I am off to read the rest of The Troop and listen to Funkytown on repeat. I will leave you with this, my vision board for tomorrow:
Yes. The only thing I want to manifest is jelly donuts. Because my life is, otherwise, perfect. Happy Friday. Talk to you in FEBRUARY!
My dad, NOT the random airport guy
Sometimes pilots write messages with their flight paths!
<3 x 10000000!!!!