The Friday Dispatch: March 24, 2023
I woke up super early and then it got worse
Hi! Happy Friday! Aren’t you glad that it’s the weekend (or, y’know, close enough to the weekend that you can get a jump start on weekend thoughts)?
A quick warning: I had some other stuff planned for this week’s post. But I ditched most of it. Sadly, today’s Friday Dispatch is an in memoriam. If you can’t deal with that right now, feel free to scroll down to my usual recommendation lists.
Saying Thank You to a Very Good Boy
For my 13th birthday, I asked for “a fluffy orange kitten.” Thanks to years of Scholastic book fair posters and one-subject folders from Walmart and Office Depot, the image was clear in my mind. He would be small, but puffy, like a baby chick. He would have orange fur, except on his belly, where he would have white fur, and maybe it would go all the way up to his face. When I had an orange kitten, I would name him Orange Julius. Or maybe Julius Caesar. Or maybe…both?
On September 26, 2007, my parents and I were in the living room after school, and I was talking about my day. I remember it so clearly. My dad was sitting in his recliner, and as we talked, he draped one arm over the chair. I saw something fall from his hand to the ground. By the time my brain caught up to my eyes, I had met Orange Julius Caesar Salad Hayes.
People who have met me in any year since 2007 know Julius as a giant behemoth of a man-cat. But when he first came home, he was so tiny! During the day, my mom would carry him around in the pocket of her robe. He always insisted on being in her lap. Once he became gigantic, he sat on her desk instead. That year, at Christmas, my brother Teej got a Hot Wheels set with a circular track and electric cars. They whipped around the track at super-fast speeds. Julius, still a little guy, sat in the middle of the track and spun around, watching the cars until he made himself dizzy. That same Christmas, my dad was in the kitchen working on supper when he saw Julius climb onto a countertop and step over a lit candle. The fur on his stomach burst into flame. Daddy snatched him up and put the fire on his belly out before it could hurt Jules, or before the house could burn down. My momma switched to using a candle warmer after that.
Jules got grumpy but he also loved attention. Sometimes his breath stank. He loved laser pointers and would run after them until the very end. He didn’t meow so much as make an old-man “Mrawwwh” sound, but in the middle of the night, he would do this ethereal keening as he brought up random socks from the basement. He has a Facebook page, which I maintained, but…he unfriended me at some point???
I’ve always gotten everything I wanted. I wanted a fluffy orange kitten, and I got Julius, who was the fluffiest, the orangest, and the kittenest, even as he got older. And he got older.
A few weeks ago, my dad called me on the way home from the vet. Julius was sick. He didn’t seem to be in pain, but he had some growths that were starting to slow him down. He told me that during my April visit home, we would need to go back to the vet, because I wanted to be there when we said goodbye. But this morning, my dad called again. Julius, who will forever be a very good cat, is gone. He spent his last days at home with animal and human family members who love him very much. I write with enormous gratitude to my parents, who both showed him lots of love (and me lots of photos) in his final months). I wanted to say goodbye, but more than that, I wanted Julius to feel okay. And if him leaving is what it took, then that’s that. I’m sad. But this is a bargain I made at 13, and even though I’m sad now, it was so much more than worth it.
I love you, Jules. You will always be the biggest kitten in the world to me.
Thank you, readers, for loving and remembering him with me.
You Should Try This
Here’s what I’ve been reading/watching/consuming this week.
Last year, for my birthday, I received a few titles from Graywolf’s excellent “The Art Of” series. They’re short, highly-focused craft books, and right now I’m reading The Art of Attention. It’s a loving, high-energy, expansive look at poetry (and look through poetry). In a sense, Donald Revell is rejecting “craft” as a technical process that must be perfected to execute a vision; instead, he positions poetry as the vision itself and uses great poetry to show how we can get out of our own way as writers. Poetry and prose craft books are so different, and I like going back and forth between them.
I just, just began reading Pop Song, by Larissa Pham. I’m hoping it can help me tease out some ideas in a thing I’m writing about Taylor Swift.
Weeks ago, my friend Tara recommended the movie Catherine, Called Birdy. I added it to my queue then totally forgot about it until this week, when a cover of Young Turks from the film’s excellent soundtrack came on my Spotify Discover Weekly. Cute movie, clever story! The tween/teen in your life will probably like it. The grown-up adult who read the novel it’s based on will, too. Stream on Amazon.
My friend Tristan is in the most recent episode of a TV show called Into the Wild Frontier! I put the episode on thinking I’d just watch until I saw Tristan, but then I watched the whole thing1. It’s like the Oregon Trail games as a show. You want S2, E6, Tom Fitzpatrick: Steadfast Frontiersman. Right now, I think you can only watch it if you have a TV package, but the new season is coming soon to Peacock. If you’ve got DirecTV, you can find it (delightfully!) on THE COWBOY CHANNEL.
I rediscovered an album I love, Mount Wittenberg Orca by Dirty Projectors and Björk. The song Beautiful Mother appeared on my Discover Weekly and I couldn’t be happier. What a perfect spring song.
I bought some air-dry clay from Michael’s and I am using it to craft a little blobby man. When he is done, I’ll show you.
Things I Did Not Buy This Week
My friend Lynn tried out Lume deodorant and gave me a tube of the “invisible cream” kind. I love it! I truly cannot believe it works, but it does! It’s aluminum-free and has a great, floral scent. I have the lavender sage, but I’m going to eventually try all the other scents - and the acidified body wash (!!!). Currently I use First Aid Beauty KP Bump Eraser Body Scrub with 10% AHA in the shower as an armpit-specific scrub, because I am highly self-conscious about BO. But as soon as that’s done…peony acid juice, it is, baby.
I had hoped, when I saw there was a “surprise steal” from Peter Thomas Roth during Ulta’s 21 Days of Beauty, that it would be the Instant FirmX Face Tightener. It looks scary, and I want to play with it. But it was just the stupid eye-tightening cream. My eyes are normal! Do my whole face!
I love Oil Perfumery, and they just added a bunch of new perfume dupes (sorry, IMPRESSIONS) to their lineup. But I am under a moratorium on buying perfume right now!
These rainbow boots are cool but suede and, thus, not a great pick for spring (they’ll get wet and ruined)
I did not buy Mooncat’s Fake Halo polish, but look how shiny!
Request: if anyone ever finds these yellow floral Doc Martens in a women’s size 8.5/9 for under $100, give me a heads up! They’re on eBay a lot but I’ve never successfully snagged them, and I’ve seen a couple of completed Poshmark listings, too. They don’t need to be in great condition. Just yellow and cheery!
I love visiting Lush stores, but I can never bring myself to part with the money to buy myself anything there. However! There’s a new Super Mario2 Bros. collection and...it's tempting. The Princess Peach body spray looks up my alley but, again, fragrance moratorium, and the gold coin soap bar is adorable.
Okay, that’s it for today. Thanks for reading. Sorry that today’s post was kind of a bummer. I hope you’re ready for spring break content next week…and poetry overload all April long! Talk to you soon.
Actually, I watched TWO FULL EPISODES before I realized neither of them was Tristan’s. Oops.
Not to be confused with a New Super Mario Bros. collection, of course
I'm sorry, losing a pet is so hard. Fair sailing, Orange Julius.